I'm Coming Up So You Better Get This Party Started

So, being a Junk Pirate is basically about sorting through donations at the junk store all day. A good deal of the donations are straight-up garbage, and then the rest are sorted into reusable categories like books or toys or clothes or furniture and so on forever. But, from time to time, a real bit of junk pirate gold comes in. The Junk Pirate zine (and book) takes photocopies of all the cool images and photos and stuff and compiles them for fun and profit (believe me, there is no profit). So now this blog can fill you in on all the great finds that aren't really xerox-able. So as long as somebody is occasionally donating batteries from the digital camera, I'm hoping to update this blog regularly with the goods.

I've found it helps to get me through the working day to try to find an "item of the day". Sometimes it is clear what rules, sometimes I just have to pick the best from the pile of crap. The best items fall under a few categories:

• Stuff I need: not really interesting stuff, but something I've wanted or needed. Like, I could use a new wallet... and here is a new wallet.
• Stuff that looks cool: like a funny drawing, a cool poster, or a lava lamp.
• Stuff that is worth money: this rarely happens, but sometimes we get something genuinely valuable in the real world.
• Stuff that is old: vintage board games or stuff like that. This is more of a sub-category of things that looks cool.
• Food, drinks, or drugs: I think these items speak for themselves.
• Collections of stuff: show me one wind-up toy and you got garbage, show me two and you got some fun, show me 3 dozen and we have a winner
• Stuff that makes you think "what kind of fucking insane person would donate this to a thrift store?!?". This is the best stuff. Be it a dildo, a box of teeth, or a rotten bag of apples. Not something to keep, but well worth taking a photo of and posting it on a blog.

That is mostly how it works. Except there are lots of other fun bits and ways to goof off that might also get included. Realistically, I don't think I'm up for actually posting a new blog every day with some item, but I'll try to stay on it. Most likely you'll get about 4 postings happening all at once every week or so.

And if you think you know the thrift store I work at and who I am, just pretend you don't. It will be better for everybody involved this way.