Some sick little monkey thought they would be clever and "donate" a chocolate cake to the Junk Store. Normally we welcome donations of food, but I'm going to have to ask that perishables be given in their original packaging. This jerk just dropped this plastic bag on us containing a cake and a cinnamon sticky roll.
The cake-donating-psycho is, in fact, the person known as the Taxman. I don't even have the time to go into this guy's long history of disturbing behavior. Completely unrelated to this cake fiasco, the Taxman has recently been banned from the Junk Store on charges of violent and threatening behavior, abusing his work release terms, wearing strange elbow pads, and generally being the creepiest person I've ever come across. I would not doubt this was a poisoned cake.